Many books have been written on the subject like “Where is God when it hurts?” and topics on when God doesn’t answer, how to get your healing, how to get your blessing, etc.  Then there are the scriptures like, I know the plans I have for you, …  The prayer of faith will heal the sick… So what about the people who “live right” and ”plant their seed (beyond their 10%) tithe into the church and still live paycheck to paycheck at best?  What about when the healing doesn’t come?  What about when a ministry falls apart?  What about…  What ever the need may be, in it’s simplest form, we are asking God to change our lives from what it is to something different.   

What if God is actually bringing about the “life change” that we want so badly?  Hang with me for just a few more words.  If you think I am being insensitive to your situation please believe me when I say that I am very emphathetic and read my upcoming Bio which will be forth coming shortly  on a Bio page (need to get events in order).  God is our Creator Father.  Like a Father (parent) He sees past our wants, to what we really need and when we can handle certain things.  Example: Taylor, my 8 yr. old wants and neeeeds (NOT!) a cell phone.  Almost everyday I hear this request.  I forsee all kinds of problems even dangers if I were to give her what she wants or even thinks she needs.  ”What if God is doing the same for me as I do for Tayor, right now, where I am in my story?  What if there are lessons to learn and knowledge to gain?  What if my “experiences” are a vital part of my future?  What if “things” that are BIG to me are equivalent to a scraped knee to God?  What if  He is letting me scrape my knees in order to learn how to skate or ride a bike?  What if the ”life changing” events I in my life are specially designed for me (by an all-knowing Father) because it is what He knows will get me in the place to have what (He knows) I really want?  Do you think He knows the cry of my heart better than I do. 

Jerimiah 29:11  …plans I have for you…     James 5:15   pray with faith and the sick will be healed…

Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.

How incessant and great are the ills with which a prolonged old age is replete.

I gave in, and admitted that God was God.

I sometimes wander whether all pleasures are not substitutes for joy.

It’s so much easier to pray for a bore than to go and see one.

Let’s pray that the human race never escapes from Earth to spread its iniquity elsewhere.

Miracles do not, in fact, break the laws of nature.

No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.

Nothing that you have not given away will ever be really yours.

Reason is the natural order of truth; but imagination is the organ of meaning.

The real problem is not why some pious, humble, believing people suffer, but why some do not.

We are what we believe we are.

What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step.

With the possible exception of the equator, everything begins somewhere.

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.

You can’t get a cup of tea big enough or a book long enough to suit me.

You don’t have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.”;

I went to a movie for Valentines Day.  This may give reason to question my cuddliness, but oh well, I chose ‘The Last book of Eli’.  I walked out literally exhilarated, pumped & couldn’t quit talking about it.  Why?  I think it made more real to me the idea that the important thing in our lives is the journey we are on.  Not the goals we have set, the career we have, but rather what our journey looks like as it unfolds everyday.  To me the point of this movie was very much about Eli’s journey.  He was on this journey for 30 yrs. or so.  It reminds me of the recent end of a 10 yr. career and the grief, disbelief, hurt, etc. that I have experienced during the transition time.  There was a part in the movie were it looked as if the journey had come to an end, the disbelief, confusion, hurt, momentary doubt, so many emotions came across his face (I found myself holding my breath and feeling them with him) it was spectacular!  The ending surprized me, (loved it!) and I knew the moment I saw the books at the end that many people would be offended & outraged.  In talking to the few people who have seen, it I wasn’t wrong in my assumption.  I have read some reviews that I feel just totally missed it.  In some twisted way, this gives me some satisfaction (I think it reinforces that thought that, “I think I got it!”)  I highly recommend this movie, I don’t want to go into details in case you would go see it.  Please do!  “The Book of Eli“ is a very spiritual movie!  Take someone with you who likes action and violence, there are plenty of really cool and amazing fighting scenes.  Please go see it and let me know what you think.  I would love to have some conversations about this movie!  Really, I would.  If you must know more, here is a good review that gives a summation without ruining it for you, although the movie didn’t get great marks on the tomato meter.  Again, I think this movie is deeply spiritual and asks for the viewer to come at it from certain perspectives.  http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/10010488-book_of_eli/

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I’ve often heard people say, “If you think you are humble, it’s pretty much a sure bet that you aren’t.”  I used to be very judgemental.  I actually used to say that!  I used to say that I was only judgemental about judgemental people, or prejudiced against prejudiced people.  Yes! I actually used to say that too, and rather smugly at that, as if I had just arrived at some precipice of self and human understanding and rightly evolved!  I would often knowingly shake my head at someone elses judgemental tendencies or rant on of some people’s inability to see anything other than black and white.  I would always try to get across specific points; my opinion that judgemental people were not considerate enough to invest the time to work towards understanding the complexities of the people they were judging.  I thought it negligent to disregard the use of broader resources with which they could gain insight and educate themselves more fully regarding those whom they judged!  To me, their view was very limited and uneducated.  I had little tolerance for people with such…  little tolerance.  All the while, I did not realize that I was one of those judgemental people.  How could that be?!  Wasn’t I acting rightly by standing up for the people or groups who were wrongly judged?  No!  I wasn’t doing anything constructively.  I feared judgement and was stuck in my judgementalism!  What we  fear often controls us.  I was unaware of being controlled by judgmentalism to the point that my responses had become little more than knee-jerk reactions.  I thought that if I could get other people to see how narrow-minded they were, they would come to terms with what I could not.  Their new found openness would open a world love and freedom as they went merrily on their way offering acceptance and grace to others.  (yes, I know, what was I smoking?)  So what was really going on?  I was attempting to control the judgemental attitudes in other people because I was so fearful of that judgemental attitude being directed at me.  I wasn’t able to freely love myself and was denying myself acceptance and grace.  

I began to think about things differently when I began to understand that at its root, judging is reactionary.  When humans “judge”, we are forcing our opinions on the one judged.  Our judgement demonstrates a lack of acceptance, in other words our judgement declares someone unacceptable.  Side A wants Side B different from who they are and Side B wants the same of Side A.  The important point here?  Thought Pattern, this thought pattern can invade any and all areas of our life.  As I alluded to at the beginning of this blog, once I think I am not judgemental, I more than likely have fallen back into a narrow-minded way of thinking.  Many people would argue that we risk accepting any and everything when we become too obsessed about not judging others.  I agree.  This is why it is so important to understand that the mental process for making judgments is different from the mental process of being judgmental.  It is imperative to know the difference between good from bad.  How could we recognize a good life if we didn’t know what could ruin the possibility of that good life?  If we truly were able to reach fair-mindedness, we would also have reached a neutral standpoint.   A true neutral standpoint would be indifferent.   Wouldn’t a true indifference also be moral indifference?  What we value guides our decisions.  If our desire to not judge anything becomes our only value, we risk becoming ethically neutral.  Some people’s behavior could cause harm to other people.  There would be no need for Law enforcement and the Justice System if we did not recognize this.  It is our responsibility to protect others,  especially those weaker or more vulnerable.  My friend Marti talked about separating the judging of the person from judging the behavior.  She hit the nail on the head!  The answer is in trying with all our might to separate the judgment of people from judging the behavior.  We judge wrongly, when we judge people instead of individual behaviors.             

I want to clarify something.  We are all judgmental.  We are not one or the other.  We all have ways in which we ARE judgmental and ways in which we ARE NOT.  My goal (one that I feel is realistic) is to make a conscious effort to check my thought processes often.  Which thought process is at work?  Am I making a judgment out of true concern for others?  I will work to approach the subject with humility, compassion and the knowledge that my pride is a deceptive ugly thing that will convince me if I let it, that I am fair-minded and thus thinking and acting rightly (versus un-rightly).  I will continue exploring the many ways loving others and being judgemental are in mutual opposition to each other.  I will be sharing the Seven Distinctions Between Healthy Judgement and Judgementalism as outlined by Terry D. Cooper, a Professor of psychology and religious studies and author of ’Pride & Self-Acceptance’ (InterVarsity Press) and ‘Making Judgements Without Being Judgemental Nurturing a Clear Mind and a Generous Heart’ in my next blog.  In closing I would like to share this:       

Loving can be difficult business. It is impossible to grit the teeth and love, no matter how much we may want to. That is because human effort is only one of the two basic elements necessary for the fulfillment of all Christian goals and desires, but particularly for love. The other is God’s grace. Without grace, nothing is possible. – Roberta Bondi from her book, ‘To Love as God Loves’ (Minneapolis:Fortress, 1987), p. 35  

Jesus said, ‘Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone..’ NRSV  http://bible.oremus.org/?ql=133554577 .           

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